7 Ways to Be Happy
Are you looking for ways to be happier? In this blog post, we’ll take a look at 7 ways to be happy and the tools to implement them into your daily life.
It’s important to understand that true happiness is found on the inside. You are happy unless you start believing that there’s something you need to in order to be happy. And as you start to pursue this “something that you think you need”, you make yourself unhappy.
These 7 ways to be happy therefore have to do with addressing these things that distract you from finding your inner happiness. You can let happiness happen to you without your conscious participation, by accident, or you can choose to be happy at will.
My top picks
The best ways to be happy
Your beliefs determine how you react to circumstances around you. Form new beliefs that help you be happy and stay happy regardless of what’s going on in your life.
A quick, easy, and fun method for lowering stress and feeling more happiness instantly.
The best ways to be happy
You may be surprised that we, humans, actually need very little to be happy. We have learned from our parents, friends, teachers, tv-commercials, anywhere really, that there are things we need to be happy.
But material wealth does not equal happiness. Think about a baby. When her basic needs are met, she is happy. Happiness is our natural state of being.
Since happiness is your natural state of being, it is much more accurately described as the absence of things that make you unhappy.
When you are not sad, stressed, anxious, depressed, worrying or ill, then you are most likely happy. Under all the layers of negative emotions lies your natural state of being: Happiness.
These 7 ways to be happy focus on dealing with all the negative thoughts you have accumulated throughout your life and rewire your brain to think about happiness in a new way.
1. Take care of your mental health
The World Happiness Report has found that mental health is the single most important determinant of individual happiness.
Therefore, when you know how to deal with negative emotions and have the resilience to handle any negative events in your life, you are more likely to be happier.
The report identifies 4 individual risk factors for depression. These are:
- Low self-esteem
- Emotional immaturity
- Difficulties in communicating
- Medical illness, substance abuse
One of the ways to be happy is to protect yourself against these individual risk factors. Jump to this blog post to learn more about the risk factors and how to protect against them.
Of course, mental health disorders can be caused by many things and they come in many forms, so if you already suffer from anxiety or depression, the first thing to do is seek professional help.
1.1 Anxiety and depression are treatable and curable
The World Happiness Report identifies two strategies to improve the mental health of the adult population.
- Provide better healthcare and social support for adults who are mentally ill.
- Intervene earlier, since half of the adults who are mentally ill experienced the onset of their mental health problems by the age of 15.5
What I specifically want to do with this website and blog is to provide methods for early intervention.
If you suffer from mental health disorders know that help is available.
As mentioned, first seek professional help. After that, crawl through this blog and the resources page on the website and you will find complimentary practices that help deal with prolonged stress, anxiety and even depression.
2. Take care of your physical health
One of the ways to be happier is to make sure you are physically healthy. Our bodies and minds are connected so that one inevitably affects the other.
If you want to feel happy, make sure your body allows you to feel that way. Physical health is quite an extensive topic, but there are two things that form the foundation of being fit and healthy:
2.1 Resistance training
Resistance training is foundational to your long-term health because muscle mass optimizes you for longevity. The greater your muscle mass, the higher your survivability against all diseases.
Muscle mass also helps you regulate your weight since muscle is the primary means for getting rid of excess glucose (sugar) in your blood.
Working out may also work as a natural antidepressant.
I encourage you to start some form of resistance training. You can go to the gym, buy some weights and start working out at home, or check out some form of callisthenics program where you use your body weight to build muscle.
As always, consult with your doctor and a fitness professional first so that you will not do yourself more harm than good.
If resistance training seems like a tall order at the moment, then start with anything. Just taking a daily walk outside for 30 minutes will bring you many of the benefits of physical exercise as well as the benefits of connection to nature.
2.2 A healthy diet
I have written about this more in-depth here, but here’s a good rule of thumb:
Eat your meals between 11.00 and 19.00 every day. For me it’s three meals: lunch at 12.00, a protein shake + fruits & berries at 15.30 and then dinner sometime between 18-19.
Fill half of your plate to the brim with veggies, the remaining half fill 2/3 with good quality protein and the final 1/3 with good quality carbohydrates such as sweet potatoes or whole grain rice.
This allows your body to get all the nutrients it needs and gives it a chance to burn excess fat during the period when you are not eating (fasting).
A healthy diet combined with regular exercise will set your body up for happiness.
3. Manage your stress
Stress is a normal reaction designed to get you through challenging situations.
The problem with stress is that the way we live causes us to stress all the time. Being late from a meeting causes the same primitive reaction as coming face to face with a lion on a savannah. Not beneficial for your well-being.
Prolonged stress causes all sorts of health problems and, to no one’s surprise, prevents you from feeling happy.
Learning to relieve stress is therefore a fundamentally important way of being happy. Less stress = more happiness.
3.1. Tapping
My all-time favourite method for lowering stress levels is called the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) or “tapping”.
Why is it called tapping? Well, it is a method where you tap specific points on your body with your fingers.
This tells your central nervous system to ease off and relax and it seems to be working very effectively.
Tapping is very easy and quick to learn. Just watch the instruction video and you are ready to go. There’s even a handy app for your phone to help you get going.
You can use tapping for many other things as well, but the stress releasing exercise is quick and easy to do.
Best of all, it’s free.
(If you use the app, some of the content is available through subscription only, but the stress release exercise is free. I am not affiliated with the tapping solution, I just sincerely recommend it since it has worked wonders for me).
3.2. Deep breathing exercises
Relaxing and letting go of stress does not need to be more complicated than taking a few deep breaths:
- Sit comfortably or lie down. Take a deep breath through your nose.
- Hold your breath for a few seconds.
- Exhale slowly through your nose
- As you exhale, relax your whole body. Let every muscle loose. Pay close attention to the muscles in your face, since they tend to get really tight during the day.
- Hold your breath for a few seconds, whatever feels comfortable, and then repeat the process.
Bonus tip #1: Time your breathing so, that inhaling, holding, exhaling, and holding again, all take the same amount of time. For example, count slowly in your mind to five as you inhale, then count to five as you hold your breath, count again to five while exhaling, and count to five while your lungs are empty before you inhale again.
Bonus tip #2: As you exhale and relax, imagine the stress leaving your body. Don’t worry about the details, just use your imagination: Whatever you imagine stress leaving your body might look and feel like.
4. Learn to think positive
One of the best ways to be happy is to simply learn to think positive thoughts.
Don’t think it’s possible? Well, let me ask you this: Do you often find yourself lost in negative thoughts?
“What if things go horribly wrong?”
“I can’t do this!”
“Nothing good ever comes out of this”
“Sure, I may be happy now, but it never lasts”
Look how well you’ve managed to learn to think negative thoughts!
Just as you have learned to focus on the negative, you can train your mind to focus on the positive.
You can train and instruct your mind to focus on the positive by using techniques such as visualisation meditation.
4.1. Condition yourself to think positive
Here’s a simple exercise you can try.
Condition yourself to ask frequently: “What am I thinking?”
Use the following methods to remind yourself to ask that question:
- Make a new event in your calendar. Today 13.00-14.00: What am I thinking?
- Write it on your to-do list: What am I thinking?
- Make a notification to your phone and set an alarm for a time when you can be disturbed: What am I thinking?
- Put post-it notes around your house or office, or use a water-soluble marker to write this on your mirrors: What am I thinking?
- Make it your desktop background: What am I thinking?
The more you see these reminders, the more you remember to monitor your thoughts. If you find yourself thinking negative thoughts, replace the thought with a positive version.
For example:
Your calendar app alerts you of an upcoming event: What am I thinking? Notice what you are thinking at the moment, like “I’ll never get this report done”. Replace the negative with a positive: “I can do this report in no time!”
It takes somewhere around 21 days for your brain to establish new neural pathways and form a new habit.
Try this out, it can help you rewire your brain to be happy.
5. Manage your thoughts, feelings and behavior
In its ten years of existence, the world happiness report has concluded many times that any and all ways to be happy are really about “The capacity of individuals to manage their thoughts, feelings and behavior, as well as their interactions with others”
How does this translate to everyday life?
Understanding how your mind works is key here.
5.1 The conscious mind and the subconscious mind
Your mind is made of two parts: conscious and subconscious. There are levels to the mind besides these two, like logic and intuition, but this is the rough cut.
There are things you are aware of and things that happen without your conscious participation.
To understand how to manage your thoughts, feelings and behaviour, consider the fact that anywhere from 80 % to 100 % of your choices are made in your subconscious mind.
That’s right. It may very well be, that even the choices that you think you make consciously have already been pre-decided in the subconscious mind.
Therefore you operate mostly based on your subconscious thought patterns. Habits, beliefs, etc.
5.2 Beliefs and Habits
Some people can control their emotions and act in spite of how they feel inside.
Think about the police officers and paramedics that arrive at the scene of an accident and are able to sort things out almost without thinking about what they are doing. That’s because they have been conditioned to work under stressful conditions.
They have formed beliefs and habits that allow them to perform according to their highest potential.
They do this habitually.
It’s not any different with you and your life. You react habitually to any and all situations based on what you have learned and come to believe.
Just as someone can train to be a paramedic or a police officer, you can train to be happy.
5.3 Change your beliefs - change your life
You can form beliefs and habits that allow you to react to any situation with joy and peace of mind. You will know that everything will work out for you and that there’s nothing to worry about or be sad about.
Change your beliefs, change your life.
And how do you change your beliefs?
By changing the way you think.
Thoughts and feelings are something you can choose. It’s just a matter of making a habit out of thinking only positive thoughts.
Remember, anywhere from 80 % to 100 % of your choices are decided in your subconscious mind.
Therefore instructing your subconscious mind to pick up happy patterns is where the magic happens.
Choose consciously your thoughts, they will make up your beliefs. Your beliefs then guide you subconsciously towards a happier life.
6. Look for meaning and purpose in life
Having a purpose in life and finding meaning in what you do seem to be fundamental needs for us as human beings.
We long for meaning and purpose. We want to be seen and heard. Can you guess what happens if this need is not met? It may very well lead to anxiety or depression. Those are signals that our fundamental needs are not met.
Therefore discovering and living your purpose might be the best way to be happy and stay happy.
When we think of purpose we usually think of something grand, something larger than life. You may think that having a purpose means something that touches the whole world, but that’s not necessarily the case.
6.1 Discover Your Purpose
What we are talking about here is your purpose and the way you choose to express this purpose.
It does not have to touch every living people on this planet, it is enough that you find what’s meaningful to you.
Johann Hari, the author of “Lost Connections – Why You’re depressed and How to Find Hope” gives an excellent tip that might very well be all the advice you ever need to be happy in life:
- Think about a moment in your life when you have felt meaning and purpose.
- Think about how you could dedicate more of your life to experiencing more of these moments.
Think about it deeply.
It’s simple, yet so profound.
Find what you love and start doing it as much as you can every day.
7. Meditate
Meditation, despite slowly making its way into the mainstream, is one of those things that may still be unfamiliar to many.
For a long time, I thought that meditation is something that only monks do in seclusion to find enlightenment. But meditation is not something that is only reserved for those who seek enlightenment.
There are different practices described in blogs, books, and magazines, there are apps for your phone, the internet is full of audio and video, and the amount of options is just overwhelming.
Even with all the options out there, meditation is nothing too complicated.
7.1 What is meditation
Meditation, at its core, is simply something that connects you with your true self or inner self, whatever you want to call it.
Your true self is, well, who you truly are beneath all the layers of habits and thought patterns you have accumulated over your entire life.
Have you ever had a moment when everything just feels just as it’s supposed to be? You are calm, at peace, happy. This is your true self.
The moments of clarity and joy are usually very fleeting and few and far between. Therefore, this is precisely why meditation comes in handy. Meditation is a practice that helps you connect with these moments of clarity and happiness, your true self, more often.
Meditation bestows many benefits upon you, like reduced stress levels, more energy, focusing your thoughts etc. Meditation can even work as a natural remedy for anxiety.
And although it is one of the best ways of being happy, there’s not a single best way to meditate. I encourage you to find a practice and schedule that best suits you.
More ways to be happy
I’ve been fortunate enough to enjoy my life from time to time. I went to college and got a bachelor’s degree in marketing. Landed a job at a corporate bank, where I worked as a key account manager.
Life was (supposed to be) pretty sweet. I was surrounded by amazing people. We went to parties, travelled, and had fun. Financially I was pretty secure.
Even with all this, there was always a feeling in the back of my mind that I still wasn’t happy. I was always waiting for something more, something different.
There was always something missing. I just couldn’t be happy at the moment.
Then one day a realisation hit me: I am not happy. Why am I not happy? There’s no reason for me not to be happy. What is this all about?
From that realisation started a journey of total transformation, turning what I thought I knew about happiness upside down.
I came to understand that happiness is our natural state of being and something we can choose regardless of circumstances.
I explain it all in my book “The 3 Steps To Happiness” which you can download for free by filling out the form below.
Conclusion
True happiness is found on the inside, not in material wealth or possessions.
You are happy unless you start believing that there’s something you need to be happy.
And as you start to pursue this “something that you think you need”, you make yourself unhappy.
Learn to manage your thoughts, feelings, and behaviour and you will learn to be happy.
The 7 ways to be happy presented here are:
- Take care of your mental health
- Take care of your physical health
- Manage your stress
- Learn to think positive
- Manage your thoughts, feelings, and behaviour
- Look for meaning and purpose in life
- Meditate
Implement these in your daily life and you will learn to be happy.
Disclaimer
The entire contents of this blog are based upon the opinions of the author. It is intended for informational and educational purposes only. The information in this blog is not intended to replace a one-on-one relationship with a qualified health care professional and is not intended as medical advice. Please consult your health care professional before trying any of the products or methods based on this content. I cannot guarantee that you will be free of stress, anxiety or depression, or that you will be happy. I simply want to share with you what I have discovered during my twenty years of seeking happiness and what has worked for me may not work for you.
