Change Your Beliefs - Change Your life

Your Life Is a Product of Your Beliefs

Key Insights

  • Your beliefs determine how you view the world around you
  • You are not a victim of circumstances. You are in control of your life
  • If you are not consciously choosing your thoughts, your subconscious will guide you based on your beliefs
  • What you think consciously is often not what you believe subconsciously
  • The most important thing is to find a belief that puts you in charge of your life

To change your beliefs:

  • Find a meditation practice that you can use to instruct your subconscious mind
  • Be mindful of your thoughts
  • Choose your thoughts and feelings consciously

What Do You Believe About Your Life?

Do you believe that you are a victim of circumstances, or that you are in control of every aspect of your life? Have you always thought, that life is something that happens to you? That you are a bystander just watching life unfold, maybe just somewhat deciding where you want to go within it’s given parameters?

Then what about happiness? Do you think you are worthy of happiness? In other words, do you believe you deserve to be happy? You might say “yes I do deserve to be happy”, but subconsciously you may believe you do not.

Your beliefs about life in general, and your life in particular, lie at the core of your happiness. It is therefore of utmost importance to be aware of your beliefs and change the ones that do not serve you.

Unfortunately beliefs can be a tricky bunch. What we think we believe may actually differ from what we really believe.

“You are in control. You are not the victim of circumstances, but in fact a creator of your own reality.”

There are ways to uncover your true beliefs of course, and just by observing how you think, feel and react will give you insight to your subconscious mind: Your thoughts, words and actions reflect your beliefs. Therefore, everything you do in life, and how the world seems to you, is based on what you believe. If you see yourself as a victim, unable to affect how life unfolds around you, guess what: you act like a victim and it should be no surprise that thinking and acting like a victim will not bring you any closer to happiness.

The good news is: you can change your beliefs.

One of the most important beliefs to have is that you are in control. You are not the victim of circumstances, but in fact the creator of your own reality. Maybe you may not be able to change the whole world just by changing your beliefs, but you sure enough can change your world.

But what does it mean to be the creator of your life? Does it mean that you are a god, able to change everything around you just by thinking or saying what you want?

Well… Yes and no.

Your Mind "makes up" what you experience

There are two important ideas to understand here. The first one is that you really are a god of YOUR life in the sense that you are a creator. Your thoughts, words and actions determine how life seems to you and how it unfolds around you. The second one is what you believe, you will see. Believing is seeing, not the other way around, and that is why your beliefs are so important.

If you believe that you are the creator in control of your life, that is how life will seem like to you. On the other hand, if you believe that your thoughts, words and actions create your life, that is how life will seem like to you. Consequently, if you  believe that you have no control over circumstances in your life, that, you guessed it, will be what your life looks like to you – that you have no control.

Let’s examine this further from different perspectives. You may already be familiar with the views of “the new spirituality” in which the human being is an inseparable part of the universe, or god if you will, and able to shift energy within and around her in order to make things manifest in physical life. But it does not matter if you have adopted this belief and even if you did, it might be beneficial to start from the realm of the physical.

Look what you see in front of you. Your computer. Laptop or mobile phone maybe. You can see it, touch it, hear the sounds it makes when you tap the keyboard or screen. Pretty standard stuff, right?

Wrong. From a purely physics standpoint, you can’t really touch anything. The atoms that make up the computer or phone and molecules and cells in your body aren’t really touching each other. What is in fact happening is two energy fields interacting with each other, that interaction being converted to electrical signals that travel through your nervous system all the way to your brain and your brain making the interpretation that you are touching something. What does your computer feel like? Your brain is making it all up. You believe that you are touching a solid surface when in fact you are not.

The same goes with your eyes regarding what you see, or rather what you think you see. You do not see what’s in front of you, but rather your brain’s interpretation of it. It’s a guess based on what you have learned and come to believe during your life. And even then, what you “see” has already happened very small fractions of a second ago.

Light from the computer screen takes some time to reach your eyes, so you can only see what happened nanoseconds ago. Your eyes pick up this light and refract it to your retinas (the image is even upside down). The different wavelengths of light are then converted to electrical impulses that travel to your brain, which again, makes an informed guess about the things that are in front of you. The guess is based on what you have come to believe is true.

So you see – pun intended – how what you believe very concretely affects how the world appears to be around you.

There’s a great TED talk by Anil Seth about this subject on Youtube. Watch it to have an existential crisis 😉

Subconscious Guidance or Energy Taking Physical Form?

Now let’s take another perspective towards being the creators of our reality.

I’m bringing up the concept of manifestation here, which, in a spiritual context, refers to “something spiritual coming real”. But nowadays the word has a much wider meaning and is used to cover topics about how “your thoughts become things” or “the immaterial idea manifests itself in the physical reality”.

This may be one of the things that you think are “way out there” or “spiritual mumbo jumbo”, but try to stay with me here. Even though I have studied and tried different spiritual practices for the past fifteen years, I myself still find this topic difficult.

I have tried and tested different practices, including those where manifesting something is the main goal, and found out that they do indeed work (with some if’s and buts), but at the same time I still feel really uncomfortable when I, or someone else talks about manifestation or “the law of attraction” as it is sometimes called. It just feels weird.

It may surprise you to know that I am a man of science. I loved to study physics, mathematics and chemistry at school and I still think modern science is one of the best tools we have for explaining how the universe works. But still science can’t explain everything. More importantly science and spirituality don’t need to contradict each other

What our scientists can tell us (there is debate about this of course), is that everything in our universe is made of energy. When you dig deep enough into the core of the core particles that make up the matter in our universe, for example electrons or quarks, there are no smaller particles, that make up the bigger particles, to be found. Instead, there is energy. Vibrating on such a frequency that it takes on a physical form. This is what our spiritual teachers are also telling us. Everything is energy.

So to understand how we create our lives, think about manifestation in these following ways.

If you believe that everything is energy, then you will understand that your thoughts are also energy. If you concentrate your thoughts on a certain thing hard enough, long enough, eventually the energy of your thoughts begins to “pile up”. The vibration of your thoughts thickening, slowing down, thus vibrating on such a frequency that forms particles and taking on a physical form. This is how manifestation will work for you

If you believe that there is no magical energy that controls our destiny, then have you considered this: science still cannot explain what human consciousness is and how it comes into being. But what we usually agree upon, is that it is made of different layers or levels: the subconscious, conscious and super-conscious, or id, ego and super-ego.

"These are just two different sides to the same coin. Describing how the universe works from two different perspectives."

Your Subconscious Mind Controls 90% Of Your Actions

The most relatable part of the consciousness for us is of course the conscious mind or ego, from which we perceive most of our everyday life, but did you know that you make tens of thousands of decisions each day subconsciously? Possibly up to or even over 90 % of what you decide each day happens without your conscious participation.

For example (fortunately for us) most of our bodily functions are controlled by our subconscious mind. Breathing is a good example. You don’t have to consciously keep breathing all the time. If you did, sleeping might be somewhat of an issue.

So think about manifestation this way: you focus on a goal, visualising your goal every day. This way, you are consciously giving your subconscious mind instructions. You are telling your subconscious mind “this is what I want”. In fact, you are doing this every moment even if you are not aware of it. If you are not consciously instructing your subconscious mind, it is your beliefs about yourself and your life that determine the instructions.

Your subconscious mind then makes decisions for you throughout each day, guiding you towards your goal without you having to be consciously aware of the small choices you make each day. One day you will have reached your goal and you might wonder “how did I get here?”. This is how manifestation will work for you.

Fun fact: the two ways described are in no way contradictory. In fact, they are actually one and the same (everything is connected and there’s more going on in our subconscious mind “behind the scenes” than we can possibly imagine). These are just two different sides to the same coin. Describing how the universe works from two different perspectives.

But the point to be made here is: believe what you want and find your own truth. You may agree with one of these perspectives, both of them, or neither of them. Just be willing to accept that the universe is far more complex than you can ever know in this plane of physical existence and that you do have far more control over things in your life than you might have thought possible.

"If you believe that you, or some energy outside of you, can have the power to change your life, then you are no longer a victim of circumstances"

Find Something You Can Believe In

The most important thing is to find a belief that puts you in charge. In order to change how you think, speak and act, you must believe in your ability to control your life.

If you find it hard to think that you hold the power over the circumstances in your life, maybe you can believe that there is a higher power that can make things work in your favor. It can be god, the universe, your higher self, cosmic energy, whatever you can hold in your belief system.

The point I just made is worth repeating, rephrased: The most important thing is, that you find something you can believe in. Something that can help you gain control of your life.

If you believe that you, or some energy outside of you, can have the power to change your life, then you are no longer a victim of circumstances.

Good. Figuring out that things are not beyond your control is a major step towards living a happier life. There are of course hundreds of other things you believe about your life related to things such as money, health, relationships and indeed all aspects of your life. These beliefs may or may not serve you.

So, then, it would be beneficial to figure out which beliefs serve you and what don’t. In order to do that, you will want to figure out what you want your life to look like. Check out this page to learn more.

Also learning about the issues you might be struggling with subconsciously can be of benefit. We Will examine the options here in a February 2022 blogpost.

After you’ve recognized the beliefs that do not serve you, you will want to let go of them or change them.

How To Change Your Beliefs

Learn How to Turn Stress and Anxiety into Happiness

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    Change Your Beliefs - Change Your Life

    Beliefs we hold about ourselves and our lives can be a tough nut to crack. As we grow older, the beliefs we hold get harder and harder to change. After all, our beliefs manifest in our lives making us experience what we believe is true. What we experience then validates our belief (how many times have you said: “there we go, see that! I KNEW that was going to happen”), making that belief even stronger. It’s a vicious cycle, but not impossible to break.

    In addition to the belief that you are in control of your life, the belief that you deserve to be happy is something you must have. In fact, it goes even deeper. The underlying belief must be that you are enough. It is a core belief that you will need in order to live a happier life.

    Think about it. How many times have you said to yourself

    • I don’t have enough money
    • I don’t have enough time
    • I don’t have enough love
    • I’m not healthy enough
    • I’m not good enough

    The list goes on.

    When you believe that you are not enough, you experience the lack of things in your life.

    The belief of not being enough and other deeper issues you struggle with will need to be addressed on a subconscious level. This can be done with the help of such practices as meditation or hypnotherapy, but let’s start with something simple.

    Here are two simple but effective exercises to get you started.

    Exercise 1. Accepting and loving yourself.

    This is really simple but surprisingly difficult at first. You may feel (if you are like I was) that even the thought of loving yourself will make you uncomfortable, which is weird, but just shows that we hold some strange, non-beneficial beliefs about ourselves. This is one of the most beneficial quick and easy exercises to do, that will yield you great results.

    Do this everyday at least once:

    1. Stand in front of a mirror
    2. Look yourself in the eyes
    3. Say: “I love you” (in your head or even better, out loud)
    4. Repeat three times

    It’s a really simple exercise but you may find it difficult to do. Just stick with it even if it feels uncomfortable. It will get easier and easier with time.

    I remember how difficult this was when I first tried this exercise. It may really surprise you too how hard it is to say to yourself. But if we feel discomfort about love towards ourselves, how can we expect to express love towards another person? Even more, how can we accept the love of others, if we can’t even accept our own?

    Do this exercise every day, until you feel no more discomfort while doing it.

    When you can accept that you can love yourself, it will be easier to accept that you are worthy of the love of others too. With that, you will more easily accept that you are worthy of other things, like happiness, as well.

    Exercise 2. Choosing your thoughts and feelings

    Another thing you can try is to consciously choose how you feel. Yes, we can actually choose how we feel, it does not have to depend on the situation we are in at the moment. Of course a major part of this is being aware of our thoughts and this is something you can practice, so let’s start with choosing your thoughts first.

    Start asking to yourself: what am I thinking?

    Condition yourself to do this. Write it on post-it notes and put them around the house. Write it on your bathroom mirror. Put an alarm on your cellphone. Asking this question often enough during the day will eventually form into a habit. It takes somewhere around three weeks for your brain to adopt this new behavior, but it pays off.

    You’ll notice that once you become aware of the thoughts you are thinking, you can consciously weed out the negative ones.

    For example, when you find yourself thinking “I can’t do this”, discard that thought. Don’t give it a second thought, instead, replace it with a positive thought. Say to yourself: “I CAN do this!”.

    After some time your brain will adopt this new behavior of thinking positive thoughts.

    Important note: use positive words only, don’t try to cancel the negative thought. Your subconscious mind does not differentiate between “I am feeling down” and “I am not feeling down”. It just picks up the feeling down part. So always replace the negative thought with a positive.

    Instead of “I am feeling down” think “I feel GREAT” or “I am feeling better already”. That way you instruct your subconscious to focus on the positive.

    "Once you become aware of the thoughts you are thinking, you can consciously weed out the negative ones"

    Do You Believe What Other People Tell You?

    If this sounds like brainwashing, consider this: Would you rather have thoughts that YOU want to have, or thoughts that SOMEONE ELSE put in your head? If you are not conscious of your thoughts, it is likely that your brain is going through thoughts that someone else put there. Your friends, family, co-workers, television, the internet, you name it.

    Isn’t it time you started telling yourself what you can do, instead of believing what others think you can do?

    When you have learned to be aware of your thoughts and replace the negative with positive, you can try to start choosing how you feel. Use the same process, but replace thoughts with feelings.

    Don’t give yourself a hard time if you find yourself lost in your thoughts. Our mind tends to wonder. It happens to all of us.

    As you replace the negative thoughts with positive ones, check in on how you feel at the moment as well.

    Then choose the feeling you wish to experience and say to yourself whatever you wish your overall feeling to be at the moment. “I feel productive” or “I feel happy” or “I feel at peace”, for example.

    I admit that this might be much harder than choosing your thoughts. There are tens if not hundreds of things that constantly bombard our senses from all around and distract us from being centered and focused on how we want to feel. The impulses from the world around you are often strong enough to override your conscious efforts to choose how you feel.

    But with practice choosing your feelings will become easier and easier, you just have to stick with it.

    Practicing mindfulness is a great way to boost the power of being aware of your thoughts and feelings. For that, I recommend you take a look at how to do a simple mindfulness meditation.

    Mindfulness Meditation

    Optional: set a timer for 15 minutes

    • This way you can keep your focus on the meditation and not worry about how much time has passed

    Sit with your back straight but relaxed

    • You do not need to cross your legs, just sit comfortably on a chair, sofa, bed or pillow
    • Try to keep your back straight in a way that doesn't cause you pain
    • Push your chest out slightly
    • Place your hands on your legs with palms facing up

    Keep your eyes open

    Breathe deeply in and out three times

    Observe your thoughts

    • What thoughts come up?
    • Acknowledge your thoughts, try not to get caught with them
    • Keep your eyes open (you can blink of course)

    If you get lost in your thoughts:

    • Take a deep breath
    • Focus on your breathing for a short while
    • Try lowering your gaze so that you look at the floor about 6 feet in front of you

    When you are ready

    • Take a deep breath
    • Go on with your day

    Conclusion

    Your beliefs determine how you view the world around you. To change your life, change your beliefs.

    You are not a victim of circumstances. You are in control of your life, but if you are not consciously choosing your thoughts, your subconscious will guide you based on your beliefs

    What you think consciously is often not what you believe subconsciously. Most of the things you believe about yourself and your life you have picked up before the age of 5.

    The most important thing is to find a belief that puts you in charge of your life – You must believe that you are in control to make life work for you.

    To change your beliefs:

    • Find a meditation practice that you can use to instruct your subconscious mind
    • Be mindful of your thoughts
    • Choose your thoughts and feelings consciously

    Learn More

    Learn How to Turn Stress and Anxiety into Happiness

      By downloading the eBook you agree to join Happiness On Demand mailing list.

      We respect your privacy. Unsubscribe at any time.

      Built with ConvertKit

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